Where Dreaming Meets Waking

Waking up in a pool of sweat once again
Mind completely alert and somewhat dazed
As eyes blink from dream world to real
Consciousness’s return ushered by
The torso’s upright jerk and single bewildering thought
Lingering from that now faded and forgotten dream,
“Importance of having a partner”
…….what??
Inclination’s habit to disregard the sleeping mind
Collides with personality’s obsession to draw
Connections and find meaning
What is with coincidence lately?
In Hearing God, I read of dreams and visions as from you
In Lame Deer, indigenous beliefs are eerily similar
In Life After Church just the other day, at a time when
I felt particularly overwhelmed and overcrowded
Desire to withdraw strengthened once more
Only to be met with these lines:
In community you depend on, are challenged by and receive from God
In a way you can’t anywhere else. It’s an avenue of grace for us;
Don’t block that avenue by failing to pursue community.
Indeed, He knows all your thoughts and your reasons for doing things
And doesn’t seem to hide this insider’s knowledge
Perhaps the forty minutes of apologetics debating
That guided this drifter into coma land
Has some explaining
Or maybe this elusive essay that preoccupies the mind
Bears insight into that phrase in line seven
Not even an hour since waking, phone ringing
Another small crush placed under the lighting
Seriously??
1. of all days, today?
2. of all people, this one?
If I didn’t know any better

Or that you were undoubtedly all good
I’d say this is an unfunny bad joke on your part
What happened to the days of carefree contentment?
Of singleness and almost feministic freedom?
Why?
Why the change?
Why these circumstance?
You, my friend, have so much explaining
And these furrowed eyebrows of mine,
These uneasy laughs need some relief
I know my ears can be hard of hearing
My eyes lost their competency long ago
This idea of patience won’t die
And I’m at a loss for what to do, what to think anymore
But I’m open and I’m asking
And I’ll be waiting
Waiting…
Waiting…